Grace Sulak’s family: ‘She’s definitely with us’

The Island Packet and The Beaufort Gazette will update readers on some of the most memorable people we covered in 2016. Here is the first story in our “Where are they now?” series. Scroll to the bottom for a complete index.

Grace Sulak’s seat sat empty at Thanksgiving — her favorite holiday.

“We actually had a spot for her,” Kristen Sulak said as she sat outside her Bluffton home. “She had her own spot here with us.”

As she spoke, a windchime designed to ring the tones of “Amazing Grace” blew in the wind in their back yard.

Grace, her 14-year-old daughter, died May 7 in a hit-and-run crash on Interstate 26 in Calhoun County as she rode with her best friend, Emma Dewey, and Dewey’s mother, Andrea Dewey, back from a track meet in Columbia. The girls were students at River Ridge Academy.

The driver involved fled the area, the S.C. Highway Patrol said, leaving Andrea and Emma Dewey injured when their Nissan Rogue SUV ran off the road and struck a tree.

The patrol is still looking for the driver.

“Every year, we have about 40 people here,” Kristen said in a post-Thanksgiving interview. “So the first thought was, ‘We are not going to do Thanksgiving’ But then we were like, ‘Grace would wring our necks if we didn’t have Thanksgiving.’ ”

The nerves of any talk of politics were diminished as their family from Massachusetts, New Jersey, Florida, Myrtle Beach and Colorado descended on the house.

“They came down here with one thing in mind, and that was to get us through Thanksgiving,” said Heidi Hanson, Grace’s parent and Kristen’s partner.

“Grace was with us if there was no talk about politics,” Kristen joked with a smile that came more naturally than had been possible before. “You’ve never seen a family more divided than ours.”

“It brought peace to know that there are all of these people who love her, and we are able to be together for her,” she said.

Mourning, moving on

Since the crash, the Sulak-Hanson family is learning a new normal.

Grace’s twin sister, Faith, started her freshman year at May River High School, where she plays volleyball and continues her love of science classes.

She also started borrowing Grace’s clothes again.

That’s a good sign, Kristen said.

“(Grace) never let me do it before,” Faith said. “It was practically like when you bought a shirt, you would have half ownership of it, because Grace would borrow it like 90 percent of the time. ... We shared everything, so I don’t think that should stop.”

Heidi has taken a step back from taking care of everyone in the family to caring for herself through a support group for parents who have lost children.

“I kind of felt like (after the crash) that I was put forward and thrust out as the spokesperson for the family,” Heidi said. “And so, I was kind of the one who did the interviews, answered the door and talked with people.”

As Heidi busied herself with planning and answering questions, Kristen needed the time to mourn.

“I still refrain from going out,” Kristen said. “So I decided to go to Starbucks thinking that’s pretty neutral. What can happen at Starbucks, right?”

But as she sat outside the coffee shop one day, Kristen said she was approached by a woman who held a memorial card for Grace. She told Kristen she keeps it in her car and thinks of her daughter every day.

“Every time we go somewhere, Grace’s love just continues,” Kristen said.

‘Felt like we were flying’

Andrea Dewey remembers almost everything about the crash that killed her daughter’s best friend and left her and her daughter injured.

She remembers leaving the girls’ track meet in Columbia.

She remembers a white truck coming up fast behind her in her rear-view mirror.

She remembers starting to move into another lane to get out of the way.

She remembers running off the road and waking up to a treeline, her moaning daughter and a silent Grace.

“I remember a jolt and it felt like we were flying, but then I don’t remember anything,” Andrea said. “I remember coming back to consciousness in the car.”

Emma suffered injuries to her L-4 and L-5 vertebrae. She had surgery for a lacerated liver, broke her wrist and had a concussion. She wore a back brace, but she healed quickly and is running again.

Andrea suffered a shattered kneecap and compound fractures on both sides of her right ankle. She continues rehabilitation for her injuries. Physicians have told her walking will be painful for a year, but she can go to the gym and do exercises on a stationary bike and use an elliptical machine.

“My recovery is going well; it’s just a little slower than Emma’s,” Andrea said. “I’m really happy not to be on crutches. I’m really happy to go to the gym. I’m really happy that it’s me who has the leg injury and not her.”

Emma trained with the May River High School cross country team in the fall and plans to compete on the track team in the spring.

But both she and her mother still think about the crash every day.

“It’s hard,” Andrea said. “We miss Grace and are just getting past everything that happened. We are grateful for all of the support we’ve had, and the community has made things easier.”

‘It’s maddening’

Every time the Sulak-Hanson and Dewey families see a white truck, their hearts skip a beat.

The truck involved in the crash that killed Grace was described by the S.C. Highway Patrol as a white Dodge Ram 2500 pickup with damage to the right-front passenger side.

“In the beginning, I was like, they just need to come forward,” Kristen said. “It’s not about blaming. It’s not going to end anything. It’s not going to bring Grace back. But now it’s maddening.”

The patrol continues to receive tips from drivers, with the most recent being reported in early November, according to Lance Cpl. Matthew Southern. The Multidisciplinary Accident Investigation Team continues to check every tip, he said.

“If they could come forward, I think it would bring a lot of closure for us and for the Sulaks,” Andrea said.

From posting in truck driver forums to calling in tips given to her from other people, Heidi said she has exhausted every outlet to find the driver she believes is responsible for her daughter’s death.

“(The driver) is driving around living his life, and we are not,” Heidi said. “And I know it won’t bring us closure, but it would let us close that chapter so that we can focus on healing and moving forward.”

Grace’s fingerprints

Despite everything, life has gone on.

Emma is learning to drive. She turned 15 in September.

“It’s a little scary trying to teach her how to drive because I’m a little jumpy,” Andrea said.

“It’s really annoying,” Emma replied.

Faith also turned 15 and celebrated by going on a surprise cruise to the Bahamas with her family.

She wears a necklace with Grace’s fingerprint on it.

Heidi and Kristen began the Grace Sulak Scholarship Fund to honor students with dreams of athletics and academia.

They are also adopting a 1.3-mile trail used by both the Bluffton High and May River High cross country teams and plan to call it the “Amazing Grace Remembrance Trail.” The Bluffton Recreation Center is also naming a soccer field in honor of Grace.

“We talk about her like she’s here,” Heidi said.

“It would be painful if we didn’t say her name,” Kristen said.

Keeping their daughter’s memory alive is easy, they said, because they feel Grace’s presence every day.

“You walk around our house, and Grace is everywhere,” Heidi said. “Her room is still her room, and I walk past her picture and can still be caught off guard.

“She’s not physically here anymore, but she’s definitely with us.”

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This story was originally published December 10, 2016 at 12:00 AM with the headline "Grace Sulak’s family: ‘She’s definitely with us’."