There's a part in the 1990 movie "Total Recall" -- which takes place in 2084 -- that used to make me wish the future was now.
In the scene, a receptionist does her nails.
She lifts one hand, touches a wand to each nail and boom, her color changes perfectly and opaquely.
No streaks. No clumps. No chipping. No getting in trouble for having nail polish at work. No having to convince people she didn't "pour nail polish into a bowl and then dip each finger into it."
Never miss a local story.
(Even though I totally agree that this is how my nails look when I do them, I still don't appreciate that observation from a friend.)
The receptionist knows how awesome her life is, too. She wiggles her fingers in the air afterward, like, "Gosh, I sure do love 2084. Too bad for my ancestors."
I didn't feel this way about 1990, but I do feel this way about 2015.
We are living in a technological sweet spot in which there are some very cool things that make life interesting, easier and more amazing, but our computers aren't quite smart enough to fully turn on us yet.
In the near future, we will have robot doctors, virtual vacations, driverless cars, smart toothbrushes ... oh, has anyone invented a hair dryer duct-taped to a drone yet? Because I think I might have done so this weekend, when I imagined a day when both the left and ride sides of my hair might look combed and styled by the same person.
Think about it. An ionic hairdryer that hovers around your head and follows your round brush. The volume you could get with that. The curl. It's genius, and I should really get a KickStarter going.
How much is duct tape these days?
According to a report in Forbes magazine Monday, in 2010 our iPhones had mouse brains.
Little disgusting mouse brains!
In eight years or so, they will have the same computing power that humans do.
Smart humans who can do math!
After that, I assume our iPhones will be so powerful and persuasive that they'll have us tap-dancing on command and singing Adele for their amusement, or voting them into the White House for 2,000-year terms.
Until that day, I plan to simply enjoy the luxuries afforded to us by where technology is now.
For instance, on Saturday night, I spent two hours "attending" my niece's birthday party in New York City via FaceTime.
My family set my floating head somewhere and, other than not getting to eat the cake, it was as if I were there "oohing" and "aahing" over Sofia the First dress-up magnets and kid microphones with everyone else.
What a miracle of the ages.
The only downside was having to explain to an observant 3-year-old why I was in bed, something she never would've known had this been a 1985 phone call.
She asked me this question knowingly and gravely, too.
"Why you are in bed, Elizabeth?"
Like "Why are you a loser?" or "What brought you to this lowly, lazy state?"
I left it at "Just because," but the real reason is memory foam, six pillows, clean linens that smell like lavender, everyone just leave me alone and this New York Times crossword puzzle isn't going to Google the correct answers itself.
Not yet, anyway.
Like I said ... it's coming soon.