Murder suspect curses victim’s mother; how did it come to this?

What does it mean when a young man charged with murder curses the mother of the victim in court?

Tells her to “shut the (expletive) up”?

It means we’re in trouble in the land of the free and the home of the not-so-brave.

This chilling episode took place in North Charleston this week.

I suppose it could have happened anywhere. But the confrontation between a scolding mother and an unremorseful suspect comes a year after a much different scene in a Charleston courtroom.

A year ago, family members of the nine people slain during Bible study at Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church in downtown Charleston expressed forgiveness to the suspect. The world was stunned. The word that washed over the city was “grace.” It was even sung by President Barack Obama in his eulogy for the pastor, state Sen. Clementa Pinckney.

This week, the hurting mother of a 43-year-old bartender and musician who was gunned down in a robbery after leaving work a month ago, minced no words.

“He was a son, a grandson, a brother, an uncle, a godfather and a true friend to more people than you would ever know in your life,” the mother said to a suspect who at times smiled and crossed his arms, as seen via television.

“(He) was also a real man. If you and (the other suspect) had tried to rob him without hiding behind guns, I can guarantee that the outcome would have been much different.”

The suspect told her to “shut the (expletive) up,” and the judge warned him about contempt of court.

The mother continued.

She said, in part: “If we have anything to say about it, you will rot in jail or in hell.”

How did life get to be so cheap in our advanced society?

Police say this death came at the hands of two guys, both only 17 and both with prior records. Police say they were driving around looking for someone to rob. For that, a life was lost. And a mother was cursed.

How did we get to this point?

No respect.

The elderly Gullah folks of Hilton Head Island tell me they did not have money when they lived in sea island isolation, but they had respect. They say that children were disciplined by anyone in the village — and that was before they got home.

Society has gotten too advanced for butt cuttin’s and the simple word “no.”

When Montford Point Marine Frankie Washington of Seabrook passed away this spring, his large family told me that he was disrespected in his life due to the color of his skin, but he demanded that his children and grandchildren show respect to others.

Grandson Clayton Washington, an educator in Delaware, said, “We were first taught that manners will take you farther than money by our grandmother. It was a profound statement back then, and it definitely is still true today. We’re dealing with too many students from this generation who don’t show respect. I see too many students disrespecting teachers. They’re missing that piece — that you have to show respect, and that’s the part my family taught us.”

That is respect for elders, for the law, for critics, for the president, for police, for the courtroom, for life — for yourself.

This week, we saw in a Lowcountry courtroom what the world looks like with no respect.

It’s a dangerous place.

This story was originally published May 24, 2016 at 4:44 PM with the headline "Murder suspect curses victim’s mother; how did it come to this?."