David Lauderdale

Good dog! Hilton Head Golden carrying Starbucks wins the beach this week

One tired pup: Dog strolls along a Hilton Head beach carrying a Starbucks coffee cup

A dog strolled along Islanders' Beach Park on Hilton Head Island with a Starbucks coffee cup on Tuesday morning, May 7, 2019.
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A dog strolled along Islanders' Beach Park on Hilton Head Island with a Starbucks coffee cup on Tuesday morning, May 7, 2019.

Hilton Head Island beach dogs are rattling the food chain.

They used to be content with tennis balls.

Now they walk the beach with cups of white chocolate mocha.

A golden retriever was seen leaving the beach at Islanders’ Beach Park this week, hustling as fast at a golden hustles, with a plastic cup of coffee in its mouth.

It was very proud of the coffee cup, and strolled the blue mat between the beach and boardwalk several times, displaying it like Miss America on the runway.

It walked all the way through the park with it, and seemed to be headed for the car.

Where did the coffee come from?

To my knowledge, there aren’t yet any Starbucks locations on the beach, but I’m sure that could be arranged.

Did the dog steal it?

Are you missing a mostly-consumed caramel cocoa cluster frappuccino?

Did you get a buzzy burst of frappy energy and dash into the ocean to grab a shark, only to get back to your towel empty handed to discover your coffee had also gone missing?

That was the leading theory on the beach.

Or maybe it was litter. Maybe the dog was picking up after people. Lord knows, we pick up after them enough.

But I have heard of dogs that are quite good at picking up litter. They have appointed themselves to the Litter Patrol, and stay very busy.

Bear in mind that our visiting sea turtles don’t like our litter — especially the tents and chairs people leave behind.

And Hilton Head beach lovers are zeroing in on the big holes people leave on the beach, and the industrial-strength shovels they bring to dig the holes. They want the town to add that to the list of “No’s” on the beach.

Now, where did I park my car? The dog got this coffee on the beach and then left for home through the Islanders' Beach Park on Hilton Head Island. Submitted

That’s what we need. A pack of goldens jacked up on coffee to haul off tents and fill in holes.

Or maybe the dog with the coffee cup was not on any kind of mission. Maybe it is simply addicted to expensive coffee and can’t leave home without it.

In that case, it really would have rattled the food chain, all the way to the top. The dog would be just like us.