You can't say we didn't warn him

I have the utmost respect for any officer of the law. Heck, I'm well acquainted with Chief Neil, and he still tolerates me to some extent. I believe his parting words on our last meeting were something to the effect that I wasn't a moral embarrassment to the community.

In any event, everything has its limits and there is just so much one can tolerate. If memory serves me correctly, I believe the following incident happened during December duck season, sometime way back when lead was still allowed in the air, octane was 104 and the only points you had to worry about were those in your distributor and not on your hunting license.

THE DUCK HUNT AND THE HUNTED

David Pointer and I were in Walterboro on the backwaters of Bennett's Point at the opening of Rock Creek, setting up our blind for an early start the next day. While collecting materials for the blind, we happened upon a huge hornets nest that appeared to be dormant. Being a collector of oddities, I figured with a bit of varnish this would make an excellent addition to my office.

The only storage at the time was an empty ice chest, so I cut the nest down and tossed it in the cooler. As the day drew short, we hastily left the area and I forgot the cooler.

Upon arriving the next day, sounds coming from the cooler gave a pretty good indication the nest was anything but dormant. I suppose the chill the previous day had something to do with the earlier inactivity from the nest.

Call it blind luck or ignorant curiosity, at the time things were going my way. Seeing as how David's natural awkwardness demands attention at all times, it was decided it would be best to move the cooler out of the blind. He had already dropped my best Haydel duck call in the river and I figured, why tempt fate?

We had a great day and ended up with a few Teal and Blue Bills to share during the upcoming holidays. The birds had decoyed easier than our previous trips and we figured they had to be fairly young ducks that moved into range.

Unloading and preparing to move, we heard noise coming from our starboard side. It was an under-cover wildlife officer wanting to check things out. He asked if we had any luck and when David answered "Some," things got a bit nasty. This had to be a new guy, as anyone can tell you "some" for folks around these parts means "a lot of ducks."

He proceeded to check out everything when he noticed the cooler sitting off in another patch of grass.

"What's in the cooler?" he asked. To which David replied, "You don't want to know."

The officer exploded, saying, "Look, buster, I have the authority of the SCWMRD with me."

Then, reaching into his coat, he pulled out a badge and waved it in our faces.

"Do you see this badge? It means I have the right to search anything in your possession which I may perceive as questionable." And he proceeded to enlighten us on the authority generated from the metal object he appeared to cherish. "I can detain you, search you, search your vehicle or anything else for that matter, is that perfectly clear?"

"Yes sir, have at it," was all I said. "I sure don't want to stand in front of you and your duties, especially since you have that badge."

We proceeded to move a bit further away and loaded the boat while the officer approached the cooler. In short, we heard a few choice words. "What the @&*#!," and the officer took off across the sparse grass and marsh in search of sanctuary. Close behind was a dark shadow trail, like you would see in a cartoon -- a mess of angry hornets.

With every yell, the officer seemed to gain a few feet in advance of the swarm. He was hip deep in mud and yelling at the top of his lungs. To which David, not knowing when to shut up, yelled back to the officer, "Your badge! Show them your badge!"

When things calmed down a bit, we made sure the officer was attended to and out of danger. When other officers arrived, David proceeded in telling them the details of the incident, including names and addresses in case there were any further questions.

About three weeks later, David called to say he received a letter from the department thanking him for attending to the officer, along with a ticket for not cooperating, or something to that respect.

As for me, it was another matter of dumb luck. I never received as much as a note, but I didn't force the issue either. I wanted to continue shooting over the waters along Bennett's Point. As I figured, what are the chances of meeting this same officer? He had now been initiated, under fire as it were.

OUTDOORS CALENDAR

HILTON HEAD ISLAND SPORTFISHING CLUB MEETING: When: July 14; Where: Yacht Club of Hilton Head Island, Palmetto Bay Marina. Notes: Guest speaker will be Capt. Tom Ogle, of Southern Kingfish Association Tournament fame, who will speak on where and how to catch the big king mackerel. Also, there will be a presentation on the SCDNR's DNA collection program in identifying red drum and cobia, and how local anglers can participate. Cash bar and dinner from 6:15-7 p.m. Program starts at 7 p.m. Guests welcome. Information: Call Dave at 785-4106 or e-mail dave@hargray.com.